...a member of the Toon Army!
Dette er noe jeg klipte ut fra MATCH for noen år siden, og det meste er desverre like aktuelt i dag:
1. A replica shirt. A Geordie's favourite piece of clothing and a necessary garment if you want to fit in with all your mates in the Toon Army-remember any supporter not wearing a shirt at St.James'Park sticks out like a sore thumb.
2. A big bin, so that you can get rid of your Ruud Gulit dreadlock wigs and "We love sexy football" shirts. Fat lot of use they were, the football was about as sexy as a wet weekend in Whitley Bay.
3. A good pair of earplugs. The last thing you want to hear are gloating Mackems winding you up about their win at St.James' and the fact that they're above you in the league. Well, earplugs or a big stick.
4. Sky Television. Even with the expansion of St.James' Park, the Toon Army are a fanatical bunch and you'll be struggling to get a ticket to go and see Newcastle play-even the waiting list for tickets is bigger than the average attendance of many Football League clubs!
5. Football boots. Keep them on you at all times as well coz the way things have been going for Toon this season, you never know when you might get that call from Bobby Robson!
6. A strong sense of humour, so you can laugh back when all your mates give you a ribbing about Newcastle's back four.
7. Optimism. Well, at least you've got something to look forward to now when local boy Bobby Robson in charge. Cheer up, it could be much worse. You could be an Aberdeen fan!
8. A car or wads of cash. Apart from the other teams in the North-East, Newcastle is nearer to most Scottish grounds than it is to the rest of the Premiership clubs.
9. A notepad and a pen. Then you can keep track of all the players (and managers) that have been coming and going recently!
10. Be prepared to stand up. In protest at spiralling seasonticket prices or if the Toon board decide to take your seat away!
11. Long memories. Then you can console yourself and reflect that it's not that long ago since Kevin Keegan was in charge, you were top of the league, trashing Manchester United 5-0 and beating Barcelona in the Champions Leage.
